Responsibility Of Christians In Responding To Aberrant/Abusive Groups

[Curious]

(Please forgive me, untohim. I wrote all this before I saw that you have redirected us. I hope you will allow me to give a quick explanation to Ohio, who i feel deserves an explanation from me on this).

Yes, dear Ohio, I acknowledge my ‘outburst’ could use an explanation and seems a little out of character for me. Trapped and aron have already done a good job to help contextualise my way-off-the-beaten-track post.

I can add a few things. Only a qualified professional can deliver a clinical diagnosis of narcissism. I am certainly not qualified to say so of the leadership of the LC. But a person may identify traits of it in others. Narcissism is definitely a fad word, along with ‘empath’ and professionals cringe at these terms being applied in a casual way by unqualified people. However, traits of narcissism do forms patterns and as Trapped and aron have helped to pad out, a fairly full cluster is evident in the leadership of the LC, including that narcissists, sadly, are drawn to religion, for reasons that can serve their interests well.

A few more traits are: love bombing a new ‘target’, financial and other forms of exploitation, gas-lighting, destroying reputation (slander campaign when ‘injured’), seeing self as victim, shallowness; no ability to reflect on life issues, or to see another person’s point of view. Low or no empathy, avoiding meaningful connection with others. They are entitled and do not show gratitude, materialism as a means to demonstrate high status. oh, and here's a biggie...they are highly sensitive to and hostile towards any questioning, criticism or accountability being brought to them, though openly critical of others. and i nearly forgot the other biggie, they have a high need for control. To legitimize their control, peddling doctrines or rationale requiring submission of those around them. There are many traits that cross-over to ‘a Jezebel spirit’, maybe a Christian version of a similar profile.

Keeping away from them is for one’s own safety and sanity, not out of hate. We can and should pray for them, as the narcissist lives in their own inner hell. But as trapped said, engaging with them does not help them and can damage us. In this respect they can do great harm to others. They exploit love and kindness, it does not win them over. One can learn this at great cost.

WL probably also suffered another current catch-word, PTSD, as he was waterboarded during WWII, a form of torture and certainly one that would be expected to cause lasting harm. Likely linked to his narcissistic traits. That is also worth considering. (A British movie ‘The Railwayman’ with actor Colin Firth is a good watch to consider this topic as well as the power of forgiveness).

All this said, the warning I gave still stands. To get an understanding of narcissism as a pattern that can be present to varying degrees in the people we may come across is I believe, good advice. I was being a little tongue-in-cheek in my post but I did want to make a strong point. N’s do harm and will drag others down. I was also saying, step back and look objectively and analytically, (the whole clip-board thing). The way they handled the Casteels is especially clear, and Steve Isitt. It was extreme as well as horrifying, and inexcusable.

On a personal note, I advised, don’t be burned twice. I have been burned twice. The second time more subtle or I would have worked it out sooner. Like trapped, I say, forgive them but identify what you are dealing with. They have a special skill-set that an emotionally healthy person doesn’t have, and they are committed to prevailing over others with a force that can be shocking to perceive. Not every bully is a narcissist, but narcissists do bully, though can do it covertly not always overtly.

That’s what is behind my outrageous post!! I am happy we leave this subject behind now, with respect to our administrator's directive.