Testimony of Albert Zehr Former LC Elder/Leader in Canada

[UntoHim]

OUR STORY IN BRIEF
Albert Zehr

As Posted on Facebook

In 1971 after an exciting experience with the Holy Spirit I was no longer able to maintain my position as a pastor in the denomination. At that time friends who were involved with the local church invited us and we felt very accepted and became a part of that movement in the fall of 1971. Of course, any experiences deemed charismatic were ridiculed and had to be disregarded.

During the following years until 1989 we poured out our life and everything we had, serving as an elder and being very much involved in the trainings and visiting numerous local churches. This included two years 1978 to 1979 in Anaheim where I sat in on the beginning translation of the recovery version with John Ingals and others. I did also have some not so pleasant experiences with, P.L., D.T. And others?

During a winter training in Irving in 1989 Witness Lee asked me to come to his room, he wanted to share his heart with me. At that meeting he informed me that there were reports that I have become quite controlling, putting pressure on the Saints concerning their need for attending trainings and doorknocking’s etc. Also that I was imposing the ministry and overriding the plans of the local leaders in the smaller churches that I was visiting.

I told him I needed time to pray and I would respond. The next days I walked on the streets and wept as I received great personal revelation that indeed I had become a controller. I accepted that revelation and repented to the Lord and to WL and my fellow elders, and offered to resign. I recognized that this was my true condition in spite of the fact that I thought I was only trying to fulfil my responsibility to the ministry. This experience was like a veil being removed from my eyes and to see who and what I had become. However, there was another veil yet to be removed in the coming months.

In the coming months somehow I got a further revelation, that in fact the entire movement and system that I had become a part of was indeed also a great controlling, abusive and exclusive institution. But, I was not yet ready to give up hope on the “recovery.” After-all I had invested seventeen of the best years of my life.

After this I rationalized that if this movement had veered off course it could perhaps be corrected, however if it had these control and exclusive factors in it’s roots then there would be no hope for there to be a correction. In order to deal with this question I went to South San Francisco to meet with some of the early pioneer leaders who were no longer part of the recovery to ask them, what did they see at the very beginning and foundation of that what we called recovery.

From what I learned from them, some of the deep problems such as Witness Lee not being able to accept any input from peers was already there at the beginning. I also got the inside story concerning the T Austin Sparks controversy and other stories concerning which we had received only one-sided information. From this I had to conclude that there was no hope to correct or adjust the course of “The Recovery” since many flaws, like presumption, exclusivity and control were already in the foundation. So, I had no recourse but to leave.

By this time Janet and our four adult children, two of them had been in the one year Taiwan training, each received personal revelation and could no longer stay. We all chose to leave as quietly as possible in late 1989 after serving for 17 years, however, we realized that only upon a visitation from the Lord and the clear revelation would anyone be able to pay the price to step out of this movement.

By God’s grace I came to realize that this movement did not make me a controller but rather brought that element of my character into an environment where it could thrive. Therefore instead of blaming and accusing the ministry I took personal responsibility, and confessed to as many people as were opened to my confession. Owning this fact, the Lord had to deeply deal with that control element of my personality. I believe to a great extent that was the most significant factor in my becoming a gentle spiritual father who loves nothing else but to see God’s children thrive and learn to hear God personally and come to the fulness of their calling.

As we left we were encouraged by some departing leaders to bring together former “l.c saints.” Some felt we could do the church thing in the proper way, but I felt that we needed to relate to other believers otherwise we may simply recycle the same problems. Of course I do appreciate that we gained much during our time there, however we needed five years to let go of our critical and judgmental spirit, drop our exclusive attitudes and fall in love with our Father’s larger family. Twenty five years ago the Lord joined us with a wonderful church and International ministry, which we are enjoying to this day.

By now we have access to countless believers both locally and internationally enjoying ABBA‘S wonderful family.
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[UntoHim]

Open Letter from Albert Zehr to The Local Churches 1989