My Journey to the Local Church, and beyond...

[UntoHim]

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. (2 Corinthians 1:3,4)

NeitherFirstnorLast,

I thought of this verse when reading of your dilemma. There are many Psalms that you will find helpful in troubled times as well. David referred to God as his "rock", especially when the world around him seemed to be shaken. As for your son's situation I can give you some advise which comes from personal experience. I have a child who was seeing a professional counselor, and when the counselor contacted me, upon my child's insistence, I was not totally forthcoming with information about the situation/history. I now regret that because it just made the situation worse.

[ZNPaaneah]

I was troubled by this testimony. I do not have any of the details, but it seems to me that no one would counsel you to lie if this was a case of a serious felony. Second, being guilty is one thing, deciding what the proper punishment or judgement is another. I think you are in a position to help guide the judgement side as much as possible. I will share my own personal experience which may or may not be relevant, you didn't give us enough information to know.

I was called to my son's school when he was a senior in HS. He was accused of threatening a girl and the dean's made it clear that this could hold the penalty of a superintendent suspension, which in turn could threaten his scholarship which was valued at about $130,000.

Prior to going I read through the manual on how to deal with various issues among students, it is available to parents on the internet, but I am a teacher and was already familiar with it.

After the Dean's made their presentation I asked to see my son's file. This is your right accorded by the Chancellor. They responded that he didn't have a file, this was the first incident in four years. I then asked if it was common tactic at this school to make a "superintendent's suspension" the first step in disciplining a student. The manual makes it very clear that it is to be a last step. That caused them to immediately back pedal and apologize. I then asked if the girl in question had been advised of a safety transfer. (the school system transfers students who feel threatened to other schools). They were outraged over this suggestion (the girl in question was the saledictorian and graduation was in a few months, my son was the valedictorian, this was a cat fight between two prima donnas). I stood my ground, I pointed out that if anything happened they have already warned me that my son could face a suspension and that could cost me $130,000. I told them that in an event like that I would surely sue the school. My son also has the right to walk the halls and feel safe, not like he could lose $130,000 at any moment. I literally demanded that they call the parents in and advise them of the right to have their daughter get a safety transfer. This was done, and everyone agreed that it was a big deal over nothing. This girl tried to intimidate my son and was put in her place. My son was upset with me initially, but when he realized everyone is a big boy and can handle it he then came to appreciate the hard nosed approach.

[NeitherFirstnorLast]

Originally Posted by ZNPaaneah

I was troubled by this testimony. I do not have any of the details, but it seems to me that no one would counsel you to lie if this was a case of a serious felony.

I do not understand the reasoning of the lawyer either brother - other than to say that it seems to me that lawyers typically make names for themselves by trying cases - and not by pleading them out. This is a case where a "not guilty" plea would go infinitely worse than a guilty one would; and the guilty plea is the honest one (even by his own admission).

[Hope]

Dear Brother in Christ, Neitherfirstnorlast,

There is surely no deeper heartbreak than when a child goes astray. You are in my prayers and as is your son and family.

For this kind of situation you need the support of believers who may be close to you. Seek them out.

Do not spend a lot of time in introspection as to what you may have done wrong. We do have an enemy. Adam and Eve had the creator God as their father and due to the work of the subtle enemy they were deceived and sinned. One aspect of your current dilemma is the need to fight the spiritual warfare and bind the devil’s work.

Another aspect of the situation which surely needs the wisdom from above is how you should react to your son. Consider the story of the prodigal son. Or we could call the passage in Luke 15 the story of the “loving father.” The father did not go to the pig sty to rescue the boy. But you can see he must have been praying for him because while the boy was still a great way off he ran to him. Here we can see many principles. The most outstanding one as regards the wayward son is that the last chapter had not been written when he left home. Believe that God has prepared good works for your son to walk in. Believe and pray according to God’s plan for him.

For the parents there is a warning in the story of David’s son Absalom. (In First Kings, there is a verse that reveals a huge flaw in David’s dealings with his children. 1 Kings 1:6a, And his father had not displeased him at any time in saying, Why hast thou done so? KJV )

In love and concern, I urge you not to fear displeasing your son. Absalom came very close to destroying his father and his family. Even at the end, David was overwhelmed with concern for Absalom. 2 Sam 18:33, Then the king was deeply moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept. And as he went, he said thus:"O my son Absalom — my son, my son Absalom — if only I had died in your place! O Absalom my son, my son!" NKJV

May the Lord comfort you and give you strength and courage.

Your brother in Christ Jesus,

Hope

[NeitherFirstnorLast]

Amen brother, and thank you. These words I will take to heart!

[NeitherFirstnorLast]

This weekend, the weekend of March 19th, there is a conference being held in Calgary.

I am home alone. My wife and my children, they are at the conference - and I blessed their going - I've no issue with their attendance. For my wife, it is a time to spend with our eldest son... who travelled here with some of the others from our old locality to be here at the conference. For my younger children, it is time to spend with friends and see many of the members of the Body we have grown to love dearly over the past few years. Many asked me to come also... but I had no peace to go.

I love many of those people, and in many ways (forgive me Lord), I wish I was duller of senses. I almost wish that I could simply mindlessly follow and sing and cheer. Almost. Lord, I know You kept me open to see more... I know You love me, and them... Lord, I just pray I'm standing on the proper ground. I pray You open me further to what You would have me do, say, live. Lord, I just want to be one who is wholly for You. I need You Lord... please Lord Jesus.

Amen

[UntoHim]

NeitherFirstnorLast,

Unfortunately for me, I can relate to your situation. Sometimes it can feel like you are in between a rock and a hard place. I think you can be assured, eventually, that it was God that put you in this place. Doesn't seem so pleasant right now, but time has a tendency to clarify things. In the mean time there is some frustration and some hurting to go through. My suggestion would be to turn to the Psalms. King David had enemies - some from without (the nations) and some from within (his own family). Some of the opposition and troubles came from the devil, some of the troubles came of his own doing. So many of the Psalms express both sides of the coin, so to speak. I am NOT saying that what is happening with you fits so neat and tidy into a form, or that what is written their in the Palms is the cure-all to your situation, only that they may give you some needed perspective or insight.

Back a number of years ago, as I was looking back at some similar things the Lord was putting me through, I wrote the following. I really wrote it to myself more than to anyone else, or any group of people.

Please don’t rush right through this, there’s something to this story,
in the end you may find that it’s God Who gets the glory.
The theme of this is not so new, in fact it’s rather old,
you may have heard it once before; all that glitters is not gold.

You need not wonder much for whom this is intended,
for the answer will depend upon who is the most offended.
So you’ll know just who you are if indeed you fit the mold,
of one who has not yet seen; all that glitters is not gold.

Once upon a time our God revealed Himself right to you,
it seemed He cast away your sin and then made all things new.
Praise Him! For this really did take place just as it’s told,
but while we’re still on this earth; all that glitters is not gold.

So the promises of God are unshakable as earth,
but the promises of man, just take them for what their worth.
The words of man are just words, even spoken loud and bold;
Volume only counts with God; all that glitters is not gold.

Oh never be mistaken not all things are from above,
so be wise as a serpent not just harmless as a dove.
Oh dear saints take careful stock, for the wood and hey you’re sold
will not make it through the fire; all that glitters is not gold

Prophets rise and prophets fall of this we can be sure,
but only time can tell us if their prophecies endure.
Some will build their own kingdom and then leave you in the cold,
take it from someone who knows; all that glitters is not gold.

As prideful as we people are no one thinks they’ve been deceived,
yet His Word says test the spirits, not just any to receive.
A wolf in sheep’s clothing may have brought you to his fold,
better find out late then never; all that glitters is not gold.

So don’t be surprised to learn that you’re under such a spell,
and come to find “the gospel truth” is really just The Gospel!
Now you cannot say to me you’ve never once been told,
the plain and simple truth is; all that glitters is not gold.

[NeitherFirstnorLast]

Originally Posted by UntoHim

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. (2 Corinthians 1:3,4)

Amen, thank you brother. We spent the last few nights watching some home movies my Dad took years ago. Back when I was truly back-slidden. Lord Jesus. I love my son, I believe he knows that. I really do need to show him that love in a more tangible way.