[InChristAlone]

OGOP, thank you for your testimony.

I don't feel I can tell you anything more thoughtful than the brothers who left their comments in this thread. Let me just share my personal experience.

I met my wife many years ago when both of us were students. Later, I found out that she was a member of the LRC. But that wasn't a big problem for me since I was a nominal Christian. To me, the LRC was another Christian church. So, after a few years of dating, we got married. I wasn't a member of the LRC but everyone welcomed me with open arms. Partly, because they were really nice and sincere people. Partly, because (as I believe it now) they saw me as a potential brother. Though, I still believe in their natural sincerity and friendliness more than in their failed expectations. (I can't complain. Then and now, my ex-brothers and sisters have always treated me well).

After our marriage, my parents-in-law tried to convert me into their faith. I refused the baptism a few times (since I had been baptized before and the Creed says: "I confess one baptism for the remission of sins"), so my new Dad and Mom let me alone. My wife was more gentle in her approach. She knew it was useless to pressure me. So, she never forced me to do anything. It was always my or "our" common will.

Thus, I started to attend meetings, conferences and trainings in my locality. And of course, every Sunday I followed my wife when she was going for the Lord’s Table meeting. I was not very active but I read the Morning Revival, prayed, "prophesied" and even broke the bread since we didn't have many brothers in our hall.

With time, all those meetings became a routine for me. Not that I hated or enjoyed them much. But they were the only form or expression of my Christian spiritual life. Now, I realize that it was not a true life in Christ but its imitation. However, years ago, I couldn't tell the difference. I was happily married and the center of my life was not God but my beloved wife.

I read some critical articles (in my native language) about the LRC but they didn't bother me. When you are dreaming, you are not realizing that it is the illusory reality of a dream. It is the same with life in the LRC. You can read all those alerts, warnings and negative reviews, but you brush them off because you accept your dream for reality, finding out an explanation to the weird things.

After a few years of marriage, I started to feel that our life in the LRC didn't bear any fruit. Well, I could blame myself for my lukewarm heart but when I looked around, I saw that my wife and I were not the only ones without any progress. It wasn't just our problem. It was a common issue in the LRC even for her zealots. Numerous meetings, trainings and conferences didn't draw people nearer to the Lord. The glorious church life didn't work. It didn't have power to transform people's hearts. No matter how hard they tried, all their efforts were in wain. And I was one of them. I was full of passions which I didn't even notice. I was nothing but a barren fig tree. (Not that I am much better now. But at least I opened my eyes a little bit and can see clearer who I am (just a great sinner) and why I need our Lord and Savior).

So, I became more cautious towards the LRC. I started to listen to the elders critically. I found this forum. It waked me up and helped me a lot to realize the nature of the LRC. And then I decided to help my wife open her eyes.

I started to study more about the Christian faith, church history, Witness Lee, the differences between the LRC and other denominations, etc. Long story short, all my attempts to talk to my wife failed. I was talking to a wall. She had never been interested to know anything new. She had her answers before I could start asking questions. Most of our conversations ended up with quarrels, anger and insults. Even when I controlled my hot temper, my wife rejected any arguments. She could hear but never listened.

Thank God, we still kept the marriage. I believe my wife to be the best woman I ever met. In spite of anything, I am happily married because our marriage is based on love, trust, and mutual respect. But there is one important thing that my wife and I are lack of. It is spiritual union.

For my wife, WL is like a prophet and a new apostle, the LRC is the only genuine Christian Church and her teachings are the recovered Christian faith. For me, WL is a false teacher, the LRC is the Witness Lee Bible study group, full of very nice people, but whose "recovery" is nothing but a dangerous imitation of the Lord’s gospel. "Dangerous" because it doesn't lead its followers anywhere. They delude themselves, thinking that they are working for Christ, building up His Church. While in reality, they are just servants of a man-made business organization.

So, it is useless to discuss the topic with my wife. I tried to do it in different ways but always failed. In most of other things, she does listen to me but not when we try to discuss her or my faith. I brought her to an Orthodox church. I introduced her to some priests and nuns. She has a very good, friendly relationship with them. Well, that was a big step for her because originally she was set against my attempts to go back to my church. At least now she doesn't mind (at least outwardly) when on Sundays we attend different churches.

My wife is still an active member of the LRC. Only God's grace can help her to see the truth. I can only pray. Witness Lee has always been a God's oracle for her. Other Christians, especially us Eastern Orthodox, are some kind of a weird ancient brontosauros who didn't catch up with the oracle.

Once again, my wife and I have physical and mental union. But we lack of spiritual union. (Though I am sure God blessed me with my wife for a reason). Our home and we ourselves are not a small church, united by the Holy Spirit. I am not sure if I am able to explain what it means. I will just say that spiritually, we live on different planets. It doesn't mean that my planet is better or I am closer to God. (In many ways, my wife is a better person and a much better Christian than me). We are just separated by the distance. I feel the centers of our lives are in different galaxies.

I have been married for 10 years. We do love each other. And I don't have any intentions to divorce my wife. But if I had a choice to go back and choose not to marry my wife, I would not have married her. The lack of spiritual union doesn't make my marriage complete. It is not the whole thing. It is not something that is capable to grow. It is alive, not dead. But it is limited and it doesn't bear spiritual fruits.

I know neither you nor your girlfriend. Besides, we have different backgrounds, so I doubt if you will have a similar experience. I just wanted to share what makes my marriage uncompleted. You don't need to learn from my poor experience. But I would ask you to listen to the brothers who gave you a good piece of advice in this thread. In short: Pray. Be honest with your girlfriend. Don't depend on your emotions. Don't depend on a man/woman. Depend on God. Leave everything to the Lord. Don't look for your way. Ask for His way for you.

There is one more advice that helped me and my wife a lot lately. I got it from my priest. If you face a dilemma and can't find a solution, read a few chapters of the Gospels in a row (with attention, reverence, humility and gratitude) before you sleep. Then pray (again - with attention, reverence, humility, repentance, and gratitude) and ask the Lord for His guidance and help. My wife and I did it once (we read the Bible together) and received the answer next morning. Criteria of the right decision were clear thoughts, assurance/confidence in the right decision, and peace of mind.

May the Lord bless and help you and your girlfriend.

Please excuse my poor English and forgive me if I offended someone's feelings.