Hope for all you church kids

Hi,
I've been a lurker on this website for about a year and a half. I check in now and then to see the latest posts and threads. I'm a former church kid. My family joined when I was in 4th grade. We eventually ended up in the heart of the church life, Orange County, CA. I was in as deep as person could possibly be. If "hooked" had a definition, it would be me. I've been out for about a year and a half now, and I couldn't be more thankful to God for showing me the truth and surrounding me with the people I needed to help support me. It wasn't easy, by any means, but I want the church kids out there to know that it is possible, and you will feel so much better once you're out.

The journey started when I met a man who had no interest in the church life whatsoever, but decided to check out our club on campus. He only help coming around because of me and we eventually started talking. As we started dating (which was already frowned upon as he wasn't in the LC), I, a devoted church kid, was doing everything in my power to "bring him in" and "unveil him" from his denominations. However, he is a VERY strong Christian and right off the bat could tell that something was wrong with the church life. Fast forward two years, our relationship is strong, except for our spiritual connection. I wouldn't leave the church life and he wasn't joining. I came to a crossroads, and no matter how he explained the wrongs of the LC, I was too brainwashed to see he was right. It was only by the Lord's mercy that I trusted GOD enough to begin my slow exit from the LC. It was a rough year. I lost my relationship with my parents. I questioned my stance on biblical truths. My relationship with God became almost nonexistent. I didn't know what truth was anymore. The road will be rough, but a year and a half after leaving, my relationship with God is strong, I married the love of my life, and I feel so free. I understand the BIBLE is the only thing we follow.

To former church kids:
1. If you're questioning the church life, don't shut down those questions-- investigate! Find the truth.
2. Remember that sometimes the Lord puts these "negative" and "veiled" people in our lives for a reason.
3. These "evil denominations" aren't "evil" at all. The church I go to now is non-denominational and there's absolutely nothing unbiblical about it. These people love Jesus and want to grow their relationship with God. The claim that denominations are "caught up in the world" is a bold faced lie. **Keep in mind though, that you need to find a home thats right for you, and not everywhere is perfect and nobody is perfect.

Hoping this helps someone out there,
ExChurchKid

[ABrotherinFaith]

1. If you're questioning the church life, don't shut down those questions-- investigate! Find the truth.

This is exactly what the Church disapproves of and openly tells people not to do, warning them that the internet is filled with slander. Someone just sent me a link to the Labor Day Conference in Chicago. The first two messages, especially the first, is an Abridged and edited version of the history of the local church. Interspersed, the speaker speaks about looking online and all the negative things that people have to say and he discourages people from investigating.

To your advice I'd add reading the Bible without footnotes, without the distraction of the ministry. Spend time with the Word.

[Trapped]

ExChurchKid,

Thanks so much for your encouraging post! Any more tips and experiences are welcome and appreciated. Glad you have found yourself in a good place and are doing well.

Trapped

[aron]

Originally Posted by ExChurchKid

I was in as deep as person could possibly be. If "hooked" had a definition, it would be me. I've been out for about a year and a half now, and I couldn't be more thankful to God ...

I too was "sold out" for the cause, and would try to steer other Christians to the LC. What did they have to offer me? Nothing. They were in "fallen Christianity", which was full of darkness, full of faults. In the LC we had the "recovered truths" and the "proper ground" which ensured that our excitement (yelling slogans, fist pumping) was actually the Holy Spirit ("reality! reality! reality!") and not just manufactured enthusiasm. As for us, we knew "God sees no iniquity in Israel"; yet by contrast all God could see in "poor, degraded Christianity" were faults upon faults.

Then one day the FTTA trainer told us, "Don't waste your time" with the aged, the poor, the weak and the sick. He continued, don't bother with those who can't repay you in this age; rather go for the "good building material" (college students). I was aghast. I protested. This was nothing like the gospels! They ignored me. So I let it go. . . I was sold out, remember? But looking back, that was the beginning of the end . . . I left 3 years later.

This was when the transition was underway from "door knocking" to "campus work". LC'ers got their eyes trained and calibrated to scout for middle class Caucasian college students. Anyone else, meh.

On a related note, I recently met with one from the LC, who told me that this year's push on campus had a theme: they need "fresh blood for the Body". Later in considering the phrase I remembered that it was Walter Martin the vampire expert who early on warned of the dangers of this group. Coincidence? Maybe not.

[UntoHim]

Hey ExChurchKid!

Please consider registering as a forum member. Simply send an email to LocalChurchDiscussions@Gmail.Com requesting membership. Be sure to include your desired UserName (I have reserved "ExChurchKid" if you want it) We will then shoot you back a return email with a temporary password.
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[JJ]

Originally Posted by aron

On a related note, I recently met with one from the LC, who told me that this year's push on campus had a theme: they need "fresh blood for the Body". Later in considering the phrase I remembered that it was Walter Martin the vampire expert who early on warned of the dangers of this group. Coincidence? Maybe not.

Not to distract from some great reading material in this thread:
It was J. Gordon Melton (also a vampire expert, Google it) who was a paid expert witness that supported Lee and TLR in the first lawsuits against Walter Martin and Jack Sparks' books that had labeled Lee a cult leader and TLR as a cult.

Please continue the thread y'all!

[ZNPaaneah]

Originally Posted by ExChurchKid

Hi,
I've been a lurker on this website for about a year and a half. I check in now and then to see the latest posts and threads. I'm a former church kid... I lost my relationship with my parents. I questioned my stance on biblical truths. My relationship with God became almost nonexistent. I didn't know what truth was anymore. The road will be rough, but a year and a half after leaving, my relationship with God is strong, I married the love of my life, and I feel so free. I understand the BIBLE is the only thing we follow.

Can you expound a little more on why you lost your relationship with your parents and how that might be restored? It seems an unnecessary loss since you are now married.

[UntoHim]

You're right ZNP, the loss of relationship with parents and other close family members is totally unnecessary. Too bad that close, normal relationships outside of the Local Church were discouraged by Witness Lee. He labeled such common and natural relationships "as honey that spoiled the offering". Where he came up with this bizarre and totally unbiblical notion is a mystery to me. I guess it's just one of those things that he invented and used to keep the hearts and minds of his followers fully and completing devoted to himself and his so-called "ministry". Admittedly, it worked pretty darn well for over 50 years.
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[byHismercy]

Originally Posted by UntoHim

I guess it's just one of those things that he invented and used to keep the hearts and minds of his followers fully and completing devoted to himself and his so-called "ministry". Admittedly, it worked pretty darn well for over 50 years.

It's still working.

[UntoHim]

Yeah, I was afraid of that.
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[Trapped]

Originally Posted by UntoHim

You're right ZNP, the loss of relationship with parents and other close family members is totally unnecessary...
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The funny thing is, I don't understand the draw of these things for people like the blended brothers. What is in it for them to maintain complete allegiance to someone not around any longer and who will not sit at the judgment seat? What is in it for them that prevents them from being able to say "xyz was a little overkill, the Lord has shined some light, having positive family relationships (or whatever) is ok"? Is it just job security? Not being able to handle the notion that they have been wrong (to whatever degree) for a large part of their life? Serving up refried Lee sounds like just an awful job to me. I have seen in some localities when ministry is reproduced and used for certain meetings, they will quietly replace "overkill" portions with ellipses. Why can't we openly and honestly acknowledge those ellipses?

[byHismercy]

This reminds me of the doctrine and writings of Ellen G White who is the 'prophetess' of the Seventh Day Adventist church. There is so much there that was spoken which is now hidden from the average faithful SDA member. In Gods' word, 'hidden things' go hand in hand with 'darkness'.....and I totally agree...how can such things be hidden....what christian can go along with hiding all the error, sin, satanic deception....how can that be justified among those who are supposedly shepherding the flock? It righteously belongs in the light of examination by Gods' word! Let it all come before the body! Let the good be held fast.....let the rest be corrected.

[kappagamma]

Originally Posted by Trapped

The funny thing is, I don't understand the draw of these things for people like the blended brothers. What is in it for them to maintain complete allegiance to someone not around any longer and who will not sit at the judgment seat? What is in it for them that prevents them from being able to say "xyz was a little overkill, the Lord has shined some light, having positive family relationships (or whatever) is ok"? Is it just job security? Not being able to handle the notion that they have been wrong (to whatever degree) for a large part of their life? Serving up refried Lee sounds like just an awful job to me. I have seen in some localities when ministry is reproduced and used for certain meetings, they will quietly replace "overkill" portions with ellipses. Why can't we openly and honestly acknowledge those ellipses?

Sorry to jump on an old thread. Just picking through to find those that feel relatable. I think a big portion of why there isn't the change you are asking about is generational. What Boomers do you know who are quick to admit they are wrong? They do tend to be really good at sweeping stuff under rugs though. I think we will have to see a generational shift in power before there is even a chance at "change" in the LC. And by that point... if it really is just a money grubbing enterprise then the likelihood of change remains slim.

[HERn]

Originally Posted by kappagamma

Sorry to jump on an old thread. Just picking through to find those that feel relatable. I think a big portion of why there isn't the change you are asking about is generational. What Boomers do you know who are quick to admit they are wrong? They do tend to be really good at sweeping stuff under rugs though. I think we will have to see a generational shift in power before there is even a chance at "change" in the LC. And by that point... if it really is just a money grubbing enterprise then the likelihood of change remains slim.

The absolute brothers really believe that when they open their eyes after death that they will see WL standing there with his hand out saying "well done good and faithful servant". They believe this because they have allowed themselves to be deceived by evil spirits. The evil spirits' strategy in LSM and the LC is to direct attention, love, honor, and devotion to the ministry of WL. The degree to which the saints allow themselves to be distracted is the degree to which they are distracted from Jesus, His clear teachings, and the true apostles' teaching found only in the NT. If only the absolute brothers would read the NT 30 minutes for every 10 minutes they read LSM publications their minds will be transformed, their souls will be washed with pure water, and their consciences will begin to function again.

Originally Posted by ZNPaaneah

Can you expound a little more on why you lost your relationship with your parents and how that might be restored? It seems an unnecessary loss since you are now married.

Hi!

It's been a few years since I have been on and looked at questions, but I'm happy to respond to this now that the situation is different! A little reflection I guess.
My parents did not approve of my relationship or my marriage to my husband. On my wedding day, my mom literally said "I'm not happy you're marrying him" because they felt I was being led away from Christ by leaving the LR. My mom thought he was "like the Devil leading me away from Christ." I avoided them a lot because it was always so awkward and my mom didn't seem to have anything to say to me anymore. I was always very close to my parents, so it definitely hurt and felt like a hole was left in my heart.

Now in 2021, my relationship with my parents is much better. There is still some awkwardness and uncomfortable feelings, as we haven't confronted or discussed my leaving up front, but I can hang out with my family in a normal way now. I think my parents have come to accept that I left and that I haven't become less of a Christian because of it, so they can't really complain!