Hi UR,
I'm an old timer here but don't pop in very much these days. First off, you are not the only person who has left the LC and it's environment and became an 'atheist'.
You appear to me hurt, confused, possibly angry but otherwise HEALTHY. You have a strong mind that is asking questions, that is trying to sort things out and trying to get the religious mindset out of your head.
That's a great start!!!
There is one thing I did not get from your post. That is did GOD ever reveal HIMSELF to YOU personally. I know you were taught to believe, to call on the Name of the Lord, to fellowship etc... but if you don't believe God is real I think it means He has not 'appeared' to you and pulled you to Himself.
If HE has but you can only associate HIM with being connected with the LC or any Christian religion, I can understand your frustration and so does HE.
I have a tendency to yak, yak yak.. so I will stop here.
I hope you find the answers you seek in your heart. I can assure you that on this forum you are free to vent out your frustrations, to ask any questions..to be yourself.
May the GLORY LIGHT OF LOVE heal your heart and answer all your questions guiding you to inner peace.
Carol