Quote:
Originally Posted by Kevin
What should I do tomorrow? I already left the LRC movement. But these elders asked me to face them to recant my doctrinal views. They have no idea what the reformation holds where I am leaning to. All they asked is to submit to their authority. Anyone advice? Should I meet them up to rebuttal my standing? They're gonna quarantine me if I don't repent.
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Oh boy. I'm going to respond to this although I haven't made it through all of the other responses yet.
I will simply tell you what I would do, and why.
I would NOT meet with them. At all. And honestly, I would not engage with them or give them access to you...if I were you. the hard part is this is still very new for you. As a compassionate, normal human being, you're going to want to see the best in them, you will want to be heard, you are going to want to believe you're going in on equal footing...but unfortunately, you are not.
This is about control. They have no intention of listening to you. They want to wear you down, or gain something from what you say that will give them an advantage. Worse than that? Well...I don't know these particular people you're dealing with, but I know this behavior, and it's kind of psychic vampirism (for lack of a more Christiany way to say it...sorry).
But I'm serious.
People who are emotional manipulators MUST FEED ON EMOTION. They must engage with you and interact with you to maintain hope of control. As long as they can rile you up and keep you on the defensive, even if you are resisting them, they are still, ultimately, controlling you.
They cannot do that if they don't have access to you.
If you go in there (maybe you have already?) and try to get through it, just to say you tried, more power to you...but just understand that it will come at a cost. The best thing would be for you to get as far away, mentally and emotionally, as you can from their influence. There will be no convincing them.
I know I am making them sound villainous. (They very well may be.) But people doing this stuff to each other is complicated. It is hard to see this kind of thing in people you love, and who you thought loved you...and maybe even who on some level do!
You are going through part of the most painful process of separation, it sounds like...the part where there is still attachment. Call it spiritual, if you will. It is going to hurt. Like withdrawal from addiction.
You are lucky, though, because you found people who can actually give you support!!! You are here. That can shorten and lessen the pain of this time.
I apologize if I am assuming a lot...all I have to go on is what you've described, and my own experience.
It sounds to me like a no-win situation, and in such a case, I would not entertain or give energy to their mechanisms. It is most likely just going to be wheel-spinning and result in further grief for you.
You can still love them from a detached distance, and take care of yourself.
That's my two cents, fwiw.