[Nell]

Melo,

I'm so sorry for the situation you find yourself in. Witness Lee taught "If you take care of the church, the Lord will take care of your family." I'm sure you've heard this lie before.

It's amazing also that lately many new forum members are young adults and college age, and seem to have a similar problem of how to leave the Local Church without destroying your relationship with your family and those unrelated to you who became close or closer than your biological family.

These testimonies all seem to have the root lie of WL teaching to abandon your family and punishing those who don't. Also, we are indoctrinated that there is no acceptable reason to justify "leaving the church".

The truth is, the family was established by God and Christians are responsible for family members, especially parents for the children they bring into the world, to love, care for and nurture for one another. "The church" is universal and once you're "in" you cannot "leave" regardless of where you meet.

As a Sophomore in college, you are becoming your own person. You are developing a sober mind and you are not blind to the paradox you see in the LC. You are also in a position to establish your independence from the group and from your immediate family. Develop a thick skin. Instead of telling them how you really feel at this point, try to present them with new interests you're developing. What you're thinking of doing after college when they may expect you to go to the FTT. Reinforce your love for them with a "but" which indicates you may have other ideas. Make new Christian friends but don't burn any bridges. Look for opportunities for a "moment of truth" with them about who you are becoming, presented to them with grace, dignity and respect for who they are (your parents) and what they have done for you (gave you life and raised you as a Christian.)

Honestly, I don't have answers for you. I hope this helps. I went through the same type issues and it was strained for many years, but my family is growing closer again. I'm so grateful to Him for that. It seems now that there is more tolerance in some localities, but that's hard to predict.

I will pray for you Melo. You need the Lord's wisdom to care for the parents God gave you, while growing into the freedom wherein Christ has made us free. Your parents, likewise, need wisdom to care for you.

Blessings to you, Melo.

Nell