[OBW]

Tough call. Might be best to avoid any kind of typical LC fellowship. If there is to be a prayer at a meal, don't just defer to having the "elder" in the room do it. If topics that are peculiarly LC come along, be disinterested. The LC was the elephant in the room when we were with my family from 1987 until 2005/2006. It just wasn't mentioned. Then we had a significant discussion with them at a birthday dinner in early 2006 that put the whole Philip Lee / LSM issue in front of them. But after that it returned to silence. Then when my mother died in late 2007, the topic sort of came up when we privately expressed our displeasure at the inappropriate take-over of the funeral (not held at the meeting hall) by the popcorn testimonies, then the calling of songs at the gravesite afterwards. But during the time the family was together then I asked a question about a particularly popular LC passage by giving it its full context which refuses the thrust Lee pushed on it for which there never was any answer or attempt to "get back with me" after looking at it. Then a year or so later, after being asked (presumptively) whether I agreed with "Bro Lee" concerning some particular issue or point of teaching, I thought about it for a moment, and answered bluntly and truthfully "No, I do not agree." It never came back up.

I do not suggest that you try to be like me, or look for opportunities to point out their errors, or to simply tell them to drop it. But also don't just allow them to overrun your space. They are coming to visit you and should be civil and accomodating to you. You are not going to their house and insisting that they act differently for you. But at the same time, if you start getting those "elder groans" if you have a more typical prayer before a meal or anything else like that, kindly request that he/they cease from that. If there is to be any real fellowship, it needs to be on common ground, not the uncommon ground of the church.

Be positive toward any direct verse references/quotes, but don't just suffer under Leeisms surrounding them. That doesn't mean be antagonistic. If you are mentally, emotionally, and spiritually up to it, you could challenge a Leeism, but it could just be an opportunity for them to take control. Maybe you should early on request that all "fellowship" revolve around the Word, and not interpretations or meanings. After all, it was written that we should let the word of Christ dwell in us richly. Not "let the interpretations of the Word by (whoever) dwell in you richly." Stick to what is common. Christ is the unifying bond. All the "ands" divide — or at least provide opportunity for division.