Quote:
Originally Posted by alwayscurious
For those who chose to stay in the recovery in spite of knowing that not all of what is in the ministry is "good" and in spite of recognizing many of the "traditions" and ways of living may be un-biblical or not-the-norm, what made you stay? Was it the Christian family that you now have that motivated you to stay? Did the Lord specifically lead you to stay? Or did you just not want to start over alone? I'm having many doubts but also whenever I think of staying I feel like I want to but at the same time know that I might live a sort of "double life" if I stay in the recovery. If I leave, I know that my identity will be gone for a very, very long time, and that's not even touching the loneliness aspect.
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This is a personal question so I will try to answer it in a personal way. For me, I have not received a clear leading of the Lord to denounce the Lord’s Recovery movement. There are many things in it that I disagree with, but God has not made it clear that I should leave it. One former member tried very hard to convince me to leave; he exhorted me with wrong assumptions and accusations about me, and now it is hard to fellowship with him. Another Brother recently asked me if I was in or out and I found it very hard to answer. My answer was something like this: I don’t know, I don’t think I am part of the group, but I still love the saints and cannot say I am not related to them. Bottom line is that I still reach out to many to fellowship with them (mainly on the phone because of the present pandemic). Not many reach out to me, but this is typical, as most of their shepherding efforts are towards new ones.
So until (if ever) they cut me off I have no peace to cut myself off from the saints in that movement. However, I do not consider myself a member, just as I am not a member of any denomination, but my fellowship is with those in Christ, regardless of denomination.
Concerning their meetings I am finding it very difficult to attend. They are becoming more dead and formal to me, controlled by man’s ministry and agenda. You might say I am in a kind of wilderness, and seeking the Lord for a fellowship where Jesus Christ has absolute Lordship and the Spirit has absolute sovereignty. Meanwhile I am attending the church in Toronto via Zoom (not the original one or the LSM one, but a small group raised up by the Lord meeting as the church). As for now, I seem to fit right in because we all seem to love one another and Jesus Christ is exalted as Lord of All, not man. They do not seem to be exclusive and they appear to be genuinely seeking the Lord with a balance of personal devotion to the Lord and Body consciousness. Last night’s prayer meeting was so edifying to me I am still in a state of faith and love.
I hope this helps. Please feel free to contact me for fellowship.