[NZexCK]

I regret not investing my time into forming lasting friendships in high school. There was such a mental block though. They were of the world, there was this ulterior motive/pressure from our serving ones to bring them along to meetings and recruit them which felt disingenuous. I really thought the LR would be the rest of my life and my friends in there were all I needed.

I was lucky to have extended family of regular Christians that would make an effort to get together each Christmas holiday so despite my immediate family never celebrating or buying gifts, I would get them from grandparents and aunts and would still be able to relate to my friends on a certain level.

When I became an independent adult I still thought i would remain in the LC for many years. Things only started to click for me once I became a mother and decided I didn’t want to raise my kids in that environment. I feel like I’m going through my rebellious teenage years now in my late 20s instead of when I should have had them.

I think so many kids leave because they realise it was an environment they were spiritually abused in for their entire lives. Seems like most will try out other denominations at some stage and many become agnostic. Something else I hated as a CK was constantly having strangers in my house. We always provided hospitality during conferences, always had different groups of people or trainees coming over for meals. Home is supposed to be your safe place. Not constantly open to people you barely know. Occasionally is fine but it was far too frequent for my comfort.

I think initially CKs feel they are weak believers/inferior but it’s comforting when you hear/read all the stories/experiences of other ex CKs out there and realise you weren’t the only one.