Quote:
Originally Posted by Sons to Glory!
I thought to line-up some things in an outline form (as mentioned in my last post) to organize things under a few main errors, but at this moment have no peace to do so. If someone else wants to take a crack at it . . .
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I have no intention to derail this thread, but just as a further example of what's been brought up on the forum the past week:
That phrase "have no peace" makes me furious.
In bringing this up, I'm not saying that you can never say it. I'm not asking you to refrain from using it or to change your ways at all. I'm just bringing it up to try to show you that even what seems like the most innocuous, normal "why can't I say that" phrases are like injections of poison into church kids.
I hate the phrase "....don't have the peace....". It makes my jaw clench, and my shoulders tighten, and starts to give me a headache, all without my realizing it. Why? Because it was used by my mother usually when I had fully been expecting to do something I looked forward to, or something totally non-sinful, that I prepared for, got ready for, got in the car for, anticipated doing, and then......
.....on the drive to it "I don't have the peace to keep going" would flow out of her mouth, and I became the most unimportant piece of nothing at the snap of a finger.
We would have to turn around, go back home, and whatever positive, pleasant thing I was looking forward to was ripped from me for no reason. Just because "the peace" said so.
"The peace" was wielded like a weapon, and there was never a reason given. "The peace" was the all-important thing and it didn't matter if it crushed me. I learned early on that there was nothing I could do, and if this nebulous, undefined, makes-no-sense lack of "peace" reared it's ugly head then no matter how I felt, I had no choice in the matter. I was powerless. I was meaningless. I was worthless.
God got whatever He wanted, right at the time when I was looking forward to something the most, and He didn't have to give a reason, and most of all, the excitement I had just seconds prior didn't matter. And I didn't matter.
Reading that you "have no peace to do" something makes me want to throw back a tall bottle of alcohol so I don't have to be reminded of how insignificant and worth absolutely nothing "God" made me feel in the local church as a kid.
And I'm saying that as a believer.
People on this forum, you are touching serious and sometimes life-threatening issues of deep pain, abuse, and trauma in the people who come here. I can only pray that somehow the God who sees into the areas of pain in your own life can help you understand the pain of others.
To keep this on topic, I don't have the desire to make an outline at the moment either.