Unregistered

Hi Melo,

I was looking for something when I saw your post. I peruse this forum every now and then and I am registered, but I haven't logged in awhile to remember what my password is. But like you, I grew up in the local church as well. The Lord has taken me in, out, around and about in what may be described as quite an adventure.

My story is that I grew in the up the LC. When I went to college, the Lord plucked me out of that environment. Whenever I came home to visit, I would meet with the LC saints because my parents are also meeting there. During that time there was some turmoil and lawsuits against Harvest publishing house, and I was really saddened by that whole ordeal. By the time I graduated, there was yet again another big event (i.e. the quarantine), I turned 180 degrees and I extremely angry at the LC. My time in college, the Lord paired and connected me with other Christians. These are my dearest and closest spiritual companions to date. I have made more since then and most do not meet with the LC. After college, the Lord brought me back to the LC and I didn't understand, because I was still angry. Then one night, the Lord asked, "What are you doing, <my name>? These are My people, too." My first year in college, meeting with denomination campus fellowships, the Lord said to me: "Do not count them out. These are My people." Growing up in the LC, I always had the impression that those not meeting with the LC are dwelling in the synagogue of Satan and we the LCers have some really special. Going to college and coming back, I learned His presence is everywhere, especially in those who are focused on Him and Him only.

I repented of my attitude to the LC. Then the economic crises and my job forced me to quit and move back to my parents' house. But then I found myself, not being completely satisfied and still had all these lingering concerns regarding the LC, I started meeting with other local churches/assemblies not associated with the LC. I treasure all the friendships I made throughout this time and by the Lord's mercy, I still keep in touch. Because once again, the Lord brought me back to the LC. Currently, this is where I am. Sometimes, I sit wide awake in bed asking God, why did you bring me back??? Most times, I feel like a fish out of water. I even feel like I'm the end of a wall, a living stone not built up with anyone.

I can't tell you what you should do. For me, I am here because God wants me here. I serve Him. If He wants me to go fellowship with another group saints, I'm very glad to pack my bags and go. I do not compromise what the Lord has shown me, but I pray earnestly that the Lord would open my heart to forgive and love the saints in the LC equally as I love the other members of the Body. My advise to you is to listen to the Lord. Allow Him to lead you. I was very fortunate with my parents, because they understood. Talk to your parents lovingly about how the Lord is leading you. They may disapprove; that is a possibility. But do not be dismayed. Keep praying for a clear vision, softening of hearts and that He would ultimately provide you an opportunity to leave or stay whichever He wills. I know the saints are very protective of the younger generation. At the same time, we need to remind them who is really doing the protecting? Us or God. As a serving one, I want to protect you from the world and the evil one, but I've also learned to let go and just be available. We all need to have our own conversations and testimonies with the Lord.

Joshua 1:9 says "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid, neither be dismayed. For the Lord your God is with you, wherever you go."