[Bradley]

Hey guys, thanks for all the support! I really appreciate it.

Originally Posted by Koinonia

Better not to bring politics into it. Many people have different political views than you do. By making it an issue, you effectively isolate half of your audience.

Always presume that your audience is mixed.

Yes I realise this. The admin posted this for me after I sent him my testimony as an email, which is *great*, I'm glad he did - but if I had known I was writing for an audience I would have worded it slightly differently.

Very many of my acquaintances (under 30s), FTTA graduates, etc., are actually quite liberal and vocally anti-Trump.

The full-timer who told me this did say that it was spoken quite quietly, i.e. at a brother's meeting among responsible ones - not at some public conference where everyone can go. They do respect others' right to believe what they like, but among themselves they consider him part of God's economy. I respect others' right to believe this, but for me personally it is a hard pill to swallow. It tells me that the blending brothers' opinions are just opinions, rather than some oracle of God, and I find it disturbing that so many saints blindly follow it without thinking for themselves just because they feel they should be one with the ministry.

The brothers were quick to help some sisters become divorced from their husbands just because they weren't coming to the meetings or didn't want them to come

Wow, that's shocking! How dare they? I guess with the inconsistency here its just another sign that the saints are just a bunch of people, just like anyone else. Not 'one'.

You have said little about your relationship with the Lord

Well tbh, I haven't really prayed much in the last six months since I left my ex. I still love the Lord, but haven't felt comfortable going to meetings for fear of judgment. I have gone to a few denominational group meetings but its hard because I've always been taught for the last ten years how terrible Christianity is, and its difficicult to overcome that inwardly. I just went to the denom group meetings to socialise and study the Bible as I didn't feel comfortable going on the Lord's day to partake of the bread and wine.

So I'm a little in the world as a result of the lack of fellowship you could say. I listen to worldly music and meet friends at the pub to play pool. I do have this itch at the back of my mind that I will be judged one day and I keep getting verses like 'Remember Lot's wife' (Luke 17:32) spring to mind while I'm doing this stuff but now that I have a different understanding of the church I need to reevaluate my understanding on outer darkness and all this stuff.

Honestly I just need some time, I'll come back to the Lord in a solid way when I'm ready. I don't want to leave the Lord just because I left 'the church'.

You are not alone with a difficult marriage. The LC's have received archaic instructions concerning marriage, and it's surprising any of them survive

Wow, this is news to me! Haha I didn't know this. I'm not surprised however.

A few times when I went to leading brothers for support about my marriage problems over the years, I'd receive some 'interesting' fellowship. On multiple occasions I would confide in different brothers how I only get 'intimacy' from my wife a couple of times a year and they would say "me too brother, just take the cross, that's normal". Like, I'm pretty sure thats not normal at all? But I guess it is in the church lol.