[InChristAlone]

Thank you for your testimony, tasinee. I believe brothers have already replied your questions. I don't think I can add anything new or more profound to that. Let me just try to answer your questions from the Eastern Orthodox point of view.

1. What is really this 'ground of unity'? Biblically?

The ground of unity is our Savior Jesus Christ. It is He Who is the founder and the supreme Head of the Church, which is His Body (cf. Ephesians 1:22-23, 4:15; Colossians 1:18). And it is the Church which is the pillar and foundation of the truth” (1 Timothy 3:15). If we trust the apostle Paul that the pillar and foundation of truth exists, then it cannot be in error, it cannot fall, and it cannot fail. Otherwise, it ceases to be the pillar and foundation of the truth.

The unity of the Church is realized and maintained through the Holy Communion. The Holy Eucharist unites us with Christ and with each other. As the chief act of worship, the Holy Eucharist is the outward affirmation of the unity in faith, worship and love in Christ.

Is it physical position?

I don't think so. The Greek word for Church, ecclesia, implies a community called and gathered by God for a special purpose. This means that the Church can be described as the unique meeting place between God and His people. Ecclesia, united in faith and worship, uses a locality to meet but I can't imagine how the locality can be the ground of unity. The Church is founded on Christ, on the faith in Jesus Christ as the Son of God. It is Christ and our common faith in Him that unite us, not a locality.

How can I be sure that I am standing there?

I will say what makes me sure:

- Who is the founder of the Church? Is it Jesus Christ or a mere mortal like Joseph Smith, Witness Lee or Watchman Nee?

- When was the Church founded? On the day of Pentecost, 33AD, or almost 2000 years later?

- Does the clergy have the Apostolic Succession which is the tracing of a direct line of Apostolic ordination? This succession manifests itself through the unbroken succession of its bishops back to the Holy Apostles. The unbrokenness of Apostolic succession is significant because of Jesus Christ's promise that the "gates of Hell" (St. Matthew 16:18) would not prevail against the Church, and His promise that He Himself would be with the Apostles to "the end of the age" (St. Matthew 28:20).
Source: Orthodox Wiki: Apostolic Succession

- Does the Church preserve the faith and spiritual practices of the early Christian church? (Orthodox teachings today are the same as that of the first Apostles, though their mode of expression has adapted over the centuries to deal with heresies, changes in culture and so forth).

- Is the Church Democratic and Autocephalous and like the Seven Holy Churches mentioned in the Book of Revelations? There should be no earthly “Vicar of Christ” or Emperor who rules the Church.

- What is the criterion of truth in the Church? My own personal opinion? My pastor's interpretation? The Pope's word? Or the consensus of the Fathers?

2. How can I please Jesus?

Let me quote Patriarch Pavle of Serbia (1914-2009):

"St. Basil the Great says that there are three stages of spiritual growth.

The first stage is that of slave. A slave knows that his fate depends on the master to whom he belongs, who has the right to beat, kill, or sell him and his wife and children. Therefore, he will carry out his master’s will. Spiritually speaking, this is the Christian who does the will of God out of fear of hellfire. He understands that even a thousand years of living in sin will never pay off, while there he might be in torment for all of eternity.

The second stage is that of hireling. This is a free man who receives pay for his labor. He works to the extent that he gets paid. Spiritually speaking, this is the Christian whose wants to reach the highest possible level in Paradise. Not all levels there are the same. He who is worthy and good forever advances closer and closer to God, without ever attaining to Him, since God is infinite – but, still, he moves closer and closer. God, of course, is our life and our blessedness – He is our everything.

The third stage is that of son or daughter. A son carries out his father’s will not because he is afraid that his father will punish him, for he is not a slave; nor because he wants to get paid by his father, for he is not a hireling. He does so willingly, so that his father might be pleased. Spiritually speaking, this is the Christian who carries out God’s will because He loves God, so that God might be pleased.

While the first two are thinking about themselves – one does not want to be punished, while the other wants to get paid – the son or daughter is thinking about God. This is the true Christian. But no one can reach this level until he has passed through the first two. How long one will linger at each stage depends on each person individually."

Put it short, keep the Lord’s commandments, i.e. the Gospel commandments, not just the 10 commandments of the Old Testament. The Lord says, "Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me. The one who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love them and show myself to them." John 14:21

Please also remember, "Love of God is manifest in obedience to His commandments; love of our neighbor - in love of our enemies." St. Macarius of Optina

3. How can I enjoy Jesus?

Be sober. Cleanse your heart from passions and evil thoughts. And never ever look for spiritual enjoyment. Looking for joy (in prayer, Gospels, meditations, commands, good deeds, etc.) can cause Prelest, self-pride, imagining oneself to be near to God and to the realm of the divine and supernatural.

Prelest is spiritual sickness, self-delusion, deception about ourselves and our spiritual state. This occurs, as Bishop Ignatius Brianchaninov says, "when the heart desires and strives for the enjoyment of holy and divine feelings while it is still completely unfit for them." He also says that if we do not have a contrite spirit, if we recognize any kind of merit or worth in ourselves, we are in this state of deception.

John Climacus warns, “Reject with your right hand, the hand of humility, all streams of joy. Lest, since you are unworthy, this joy prove a temptation, and lead you to mistake the wolf for the shepherd.”

St. Macarius of Optina writes, "According to the Apostle Paul, real joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, to be attained only near the summit of the way, after all evil habits and thoughts are overcome, all passions conquered, and reconciliation with God is reached. Hence, in your actual condition, you cannot possibly assume that any streams of joy that flow into you or submerge you, no matter how sweet, come from heaven or that you are already partly living there."

Isaac the Syrian adds, “God’s grace comes of itself without any ambitious striving on our part. It will only come to the heart that is pure.”

Remember the parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector. The Pharisee looked for rewards from God. The Tax Collector humbly asked for mercy: "God, have mercy on me, a sinner!" It is not joy but the state of humility and repentance which opens our hearts for the Lord to enter.

Anyway, be grateful to God for all things, sorrows and joys. Glorify His name when you are happy and when you are sad. Whatever happens in your life, pray to the Lord from the bottom of your heart: "Thank you Lord! Glory to Thee, O Lord, for all things!"

4. Is it possible to be full of joy and peace outside of this LCM?

In short, yes, it is. But why and what kind of joy and peace are you looking for? What can they give to you? Besides, it's not joy or peace that should be our goal but the Lord Jesus Christ and our communion with Him.

“Wherever God is — there is peace. And the opposite is self-evident: where there is envy, enmity, impatience, self-love — there is the devil. Wherever the devil is — there, everything is ruinous, proud and hostile.” St. Anatoly of Optina

The elder Siluan of Mount Athos says, "The soul cannot know peace unless she prays for her enemies." "How should one differ a genuine union with God and imagined experiences of philosophic or pantheistic nature?". The criteria St Silouan gave was: "namely - loving the enemies" and "where the Spirit of the Lord is, there rules unconditionally humble love for the enemy and prayer for the world".

5. How can I biblically refute their expectations of me?

From my experience, no Bible verses and no arguments work. So, don't start heated discussions. Just try to change your life. Draw near to God. Read His word. Cleanse yourself from passions and evil thoughts. Last but not least: Keep the Lord’s commandments, love your sister and her husband as yourself and pray always.

May the Lord bless and help you.