[Indiana]

Brothers, I did not go to the mass expecting much at all and was not seeking a place to meet. I went that I might get more familiar with what Catholics do at mass to know how to relate to a Catholic friend of mine. I had gone there in the summer of 2010 twice and more times than that to each of these groups - Mormons and Jehovah Witnesses and 7th Day Adventists, which were all interesting and beneficial experiences. (I saw that they were all human beings, and like me, persecuted human beings - they for their reasons and me for mine - and I wanted to see for myself what they were like individually and what the meetings were like, and to see how much their church culture was similar to ours, and how much "oneness" or ground could be obtained with them to my comfort. Had to check for myself instead of writing them completely off as I had been doing for three decades automatically, in my superior church culture, which was declining before my eyes by traumatic encounters (10 such) with leaders, men who manifested no human or spiritual capacity to receive me as a fellow human being or brother in Christ, when presented with my sincere appeal to them in In the Wake of the New Way. I was soon out the door. So partly I was seeking human beings in those "church environments" I visited, just to see what my impression would be of them. With the Mormons I met with "the high priests group" one morning, then with a large group later that day to help move a mother and her daughter from their apartment. There might have been 50 people there, many standing and talking, as things were going smoothly and happily; and I said to the 20 year-old daughter, "you are so fortunate, look how many came to help your mother! Moving can be a very trying time". Later, when I was leaving, she came over and gave me a hug. I was so surprised. She was appreciative. We had made a Mormon girl and her mother happy that day.)

Neither did I go to the Presbyterian meeting last Sunday seeking a different place to meet, I had been in a Bible study there for 9 mos in 2006 and I know people there and basically - with my people at a conf up in Vancouver, I was actually a bit adrift that day and then drifted over to the Bellevue meeting also, as the doors were wide open, and no usher to turn me away (and people were standing and I could easily take a seat and have brief conversation with the sister who happened to be seated, not standing. I told her I was doing well and that the brothers don't understand that I am actually for the churches. She couldnt believe I had been away 15 years. When people were sitting back down the brothers began to head over my way; she gasped, a little alarmed, and I smiled and said they are coming for me, it is okay, I will write you a letter (she and her husb lived in Anaheim during the turmoil) and, YES, I wanted to stir the pot a bit, brother, to see what we had with them in 2016. What we have is elders continuing to cut me off without explaining themselves to me or to the churches why they do this, but who also seemed softened and subdued. But we also continue to have a central control going on from Anaheim to regulate the churches, letting churches know this one or that one is bad and brothers obey the, but robotically.

Brothers, if the Catholics had life I would testify of it. There was none.

If the Presb had an atmosphere of life I would have stayed.

But I have testified of what I did experience that day, a sweetness of Christ as life that spread to me immediately in the church in Bellevue. If enough saints know how to get to the throne, life can be transmitted into a meeting place. A leader at SCA and other leaders of the associated assemblies know their lack - the teachings prevail, but not life, not joy, and where I meet the brother is determined that every week he will ask the congregation about their exercise before the Lord that morning so that they can bring life to the meeting and the service in the church. If it takes 1 year three years, he wants to see more life and more joy, and so do I. But we all appreciate what measure we do have at SCA. I do, and the leaders do, and we love these saints. But there is so much more, and those in the Local Churches have to see what many on the forum have brought to public attention for many years. The Lord will bless or not bless what we say - as for me I just go with the anointing to speak the things I do that resonate in my being. And it takes much exercise to get to the Lord and go down deep for an hour or so in the morning before sharing those things that resonate. I agree with you, brother, we really need to get to that fountain and I have been very exercised to do so in recent weeks especially, and generally, for a very long time.