Quote:
Originally Posted by HERn
I think bro Freedom would have the best practical advice on living in the recovery but not being of the recovery. I don't know how he does it, I would have blown a gasket by now.
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Vincent,
Props to you for coming forward, that step isn't easy. A lot of good advice has been posted. Realize that the feelings of anger and frustration are just a normal reaction to seeing the LC for what it really is. It is your gut instinct telling you something is wrong.
Everyone has had different experiences in the LC, but having LC family members is never easy. I have parents, siblings and extended family who are/were involved with the LC. A few have left, others haven’t. When I have mentioned even the slightest of LC concerns, the conversation always seemed to erupt into an argument, so I learned to avoid the subject. I have remained in the LC only to remain on good terms with my LC family members.
Your concerns about suppressing anger are valid. I don’t recommend trying to hold it in. For me, when I started feeling constantly angry, I knew there had to be some change in my LC involvement, but I knew that a complete disassociation wasn’t the best course of action for me. What I ended up doing was focusing on what I could change, and that involved significantly withdrawing my LC participation, and not answering so many phone calls or text messages. I went from living and breathing LC 24/7 to attending the Sunday meeting and sitting in the back row. The latter was tolerable for me, it also limited the possibility of anyone labeling me as “negative” (which could have serious repercussions in my family relationships). You might not be able to completely change your situation to what would be ideal, but you can try to find ways to minimize the chances of saying something you would regret.
When I first became disillusioned with the LC, I was so angry and frustrated at certain things, and I really just felt like telling everyone off in the LC and making a grand exit. I eventually realized that wouldn't do any good except to give me some temporary gratification. I realized that it's better to take the high road out, whatever that may be. I know of some in the LC who look up to me. Why not let them eventually see "brother Freedom" as the brother who moved onto something better, rather than the brother was subjected to a “public hanging”?
Finally, realize that you have your whole life ahead of you. Some haven’t been so fortunate, they have spent 40+ years in the LC. Looking at the bigger picture, even if you have to stick around another year, it’s tolerable in the larger scheme of things. Eventually the opportunity to leave will arise. Try to focus on what you want next. Don’t get caught up in what you can’t change.
2 Cor 4:17
For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory