Quote:
Originally Posted by blessD
...Do you know of anyone in Dallas whose marriage was manipulated, arranged, controlled? This practice had devastating effects on lives everywhere. Did Dallas have a hands off policy of the leaders regarding personal choices like marriage partners. Were the young people allowed to date, make their own choices, and be engaged? I get the picture there was a leading elder in Dallas that took a more authoritative approach and could have been part orchestrator of my Dallas inquisition. Was there anyone that could and would balance him and stop him if he overstepped his boundaries of authority?
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BlessD,
It sounds like you were a target for some meddling old men who had the mistaken idea that their job was matchmaking. I cannot call these men elders. They in no way fit the biblical description. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us.
Did Dallas have a "hands off" policy? I have personal knowledge of a near miss. A young teenage boy in Dallas, years ago, was painfully shy. He had finally gotten up enough courage to talk to someone he liked...a sister his age who, if you can imagine the scene, was even more shy than he was! So there they were, in the meeting hall in Dallas, after a meeting, people everywhere, and they were actually
talking. You could have probably counted the words they exchanged on two hands and two feet, along with a couple of silly, embarrassed grins, but they were talking. This was
monumental!
One of the "elders" saw this conversation taking place and made a beeline toward them. He commented on the way, aloud, to the boy's father no less, that he was going to "
put a stop to this". Dad got in his way and said "if you
ever say
one word to those two, I'll break every bone in your body!" Dad 1, elder 0.
The role of the parents is huge and Dad did his job. Whether this guy would have ended up in a body cast or not, we can only speculate, but he certainly had a near miss that day.
Where are these two shy young people today? They have been married for 20+ years. They gave Dad two beautiful grandchildren. They are happy.
Nell