Quote:
Originally Posted by aron
Am I going to make it? Am I going to be approved? Am I going to be over five cities, or two, or endure "many stripes"? ...We pay the minimal lip-service to Jesus, to remind ourselves that we are redeemed, then we tackle the big bad old world the same way we used to. Agitation, effort, and eventual collapse.
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I think that the greatest frustration to me as a Christian has been the issue of will. I believe, and tremble, and try to follow, but inevitably I am just like Peter: "Not so, Lord; this will never happen to You." I have my ideas, my concepts, my likes and dislikes, my timetables, my vows, and my goals. As a believer I bring all of this stuff into my journey, and leaven it, and become frustrated.
Contrast that to the journey of Jesus. No will but for the Father's to be done. Complete submission, and untrammelled revelation and fellowship "I and the Father are one." So when I come alongside Jesus with my good intentions, and my efforts, and my ideas of "how things ought to be", I am offering my wood, hay and stubble. And Jesus, inevitably, says, "Get away from Me, you evil-doers. I never knew you". (Psalm 119:15, Matthew 7:23). He cannot, and will not, use my efforts for His kingdom.
So I end up cast aside, frustrated. The antidote for all of this, of course, is simply to repent, come back, and see Jesus. When the Word (Psa. 3) says, "I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people, that have set themselves against me round about", I realize that I am one of the ten thousands of people who have set themselves against God's Christ. As long as I have will, my ideas, my intentions, my goals, my ways, my dreams, my hopes and fears, I am just another one of the many setting myself against Jesus.
I just need to surrender. Let Jesus do the building. Let Him do the conquering, and saving the world. He is more than capable. I am utterly incapable. He has been clearly revealed to us in God's word, as God's incarnated Word, doing all of that, and much more. Yet I get so distracted by self, and thoughts, and attention to what "others" are doing, that I miss the point of the exercise, and I miss the promised blessing.
So it's good to remind myself. It's so easy to become distracted, and fall off the path.