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Originally Posted by Hope
I think here we have a clear example of the extreme practice of some of the local churches based on the extreme character of the local elders. Ray Graver in Houston and James Barber in OK City would certainly take this position. The church agenda was everything to them. On the other hand, in Dallas, Sheryl and I would make sure at least one of us attended any of our children's activities.
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Okay, you brought me out of my silence...
I don't know about your family, Hope, but based on what I know Dallas was not so different from OKC or Houston in regards to the kids.
I'm speaking from a different point of view. I was one of those kids who was OKC. Interestingly, I was shielded from a lot of what happened by a few factors, but I know of numerous kids in every locality in Texas and Oklahoma (including Dallas) that suffered at the hands of their parents' involvements in the LC.
I don't think one example (your family) mitigates the application of a broad brush.
As with any group or collective the proper judgment regarding whether a broad brush is appropriate or not is a judgment call based on a larger set of examples not just a few. It is quite difficult to make an appropriate judgment and apply it across the board. However, I do believe that there was enough abuse in families not to take it lightly or try to move past it through the use of a few examples that appear to mitigate the overall situation.
Most of all, I feel it is important to speak up for the sake of those who suffered. Their suffering was real. It cannot be mitigated by one or two good elders in the face of so many others who bowed down to the idols of the LC and sacrificed their families at the altars of false worship.
There was a lot of sin committed against families and there was a lot of failure on the part of parents to uphold their Biblical responsibilities to raise their children according the way the Lord would approve. It wasn't just isolated instances. It was pervasive. You had to be a very unique, independent, willful, strong-minded person to overcome it because the general rule was (and still is) abuse that is out of line with the Word of God.
Matt
P.S. Based on what I have heard from others it is possible that the Texas Region (inclusive of Dallas) was more extreme than other regions of the US.