[Cal]

This thread consists of the posts related to the poster named Shattered--who claimed to have been raped outside the LC and sexually molested within the LC--from another thread. I wished to separate them to avoid confusion, to allow the discussion about the Nee book to continue in the original thread, and to provide some explanation for the action related to this poster and what it says about this forum.

Some might think the action taken regarding this poster was excessive. Others might think that we failed to show Christian charity toward this woman. Others might think we discouraged other confessions about sexual abuse, or even that we've shown ourselves to be no better than LSM in banning a member who displeased us. Let me address those concerns.

1. The decision about this woman had less to do with what she was talking about than the way she chose to present it. We want women who have been abused in the LC to be able to talk about it here safely and with assurance of anonymity. For some reason, this woman decided to present herself in a brazen and abrasive manner, casting accusations at anything or anyone who did not suit her from her very first post, then turning around and denying she did those things.
   
   It seems to me that a person who wanted sympathy and support from a group wouldn't seek to antagonize it from the get-go. Had she come here in a humble, sincere manner, telling her story without accusation toward this board, then sympathy and support would have flowed to her like a river. It's hard for me to believe that she didn't realize that. Instead she choose the antagonistic route. This shows me she was more interested in lashing out than anything else.
   
   
2. Some might say, So what? The Church is supposed to support the broken and oppressed.
   
   Let me say this board is committed to the mission of the Church to support the oppressed and downtrodden.
   
   This board, however, is not a local church. It is more like a public meeting of a church, like a Sunday morning meeting where all are welcome to speak. This woman's behavior was like a visitor coming in, grabbing the microphone from the speaker, seeking to change the subject and make it all about her, castigating anyone as being off-mission who didn't agree with her, and then, when asked to stop these abuses, denying she did any of them.
   
   No church would allow such a thing to continue. Such a person would be taken aside and, in the best situation, the church would attempt to minister to her in some other way that didn't disrupt the public meeting.
   
   The difference is, on this forum there is no "some other way." The public meeting is all there is. And if "speakers" don't follow a certain decorum, the whole thing falls apart. This board simply cannot function with posters who think it's all about them and who seek to antagonize others. Besides that, this board is not equipped to minister adequately to the sexually abused or anyone with serious psychological damage.
   
   
3. Some might think our actions show that we are no better than the LC and LSM. We've banned a person who displeased us, isn't that what they do? What's the difference?
   
   I shouldn't have to say that the difference is we didn't ban anyone while also telling them they can't go on without us. We make no claims of being the unique anything, as LSM and the LC does. Every Christian group has the right to protect its integrity by restricting membership. That is biblical. What's not biblical is claiming that the banned person has no way to go on without you. We make no such claims. There are probably plenty of places that would welcome this lady, assuming she softens her antagonistic attitude, which she refused to do for us.
   
   
4. Lastly, some might fear that we've discouraged other women from telling their stories of sexual abuse in the LC, that we've shown ourselves to be a bunch of unsympathetic males, and what else is new.
   
   This one concerns me most, and I certainly hope it's false. We totally believe in the Church's mission to comfort the broken-hearted. There are just limits to what disruptions we will allow this board or its members to endure. We cannot allow an inmate to try to take over the asylum. But we do and will welcome all stories of LC abuses whose tellers don't seek to bite the hands that try to help them.
   
   Thank you for reading.
   
   Igzy