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Nell · 08-09-2008, 09:49 AM

CONTROL
TOXIC RULE #1: The leader must be in control at all times.
When a person becomes addicted to something, he or she is completely controlled by it. Deluded by the addiction, the addict is unaware of this loss of control and believes that he or she is in control. Control is a primary issue for people who suffer from an addiction. Toxic faith or religious addiction is no exception.

When the toxic faith leader struggles with control on a personal (p. 244) level, he or she attempts to be in the center of control within the system in an effort to affect all the outcomes. The leader desires to have the family say in every decision, whether minimal or monumental. When a religious addict is a parent, the children grow up with little ability to think independently because adherence to the system is so strong. Anyone not adhering to the leader's tough standards is immediately dismissed so that total control, or at least the illusion of total control, can be maintained by the leader who is addicted to the organization and the control it provides.
Control is really an illusion. No parent has complete control in any family. No leader can predict all the circumstances and stress that the ministry will confront. The more the person seeks to control the details, the less likely that person will be able to maintain a clear vision of the larger issues of balance and focus in the ministry or family. The more control is sought, the less there is to be had in any circumstance....

If faith is toxic, it exists outside God. It creates a god much different from God the Creator. The control rule exemplifies how God has been re-created in the minds of the toxic faith leader and the religious addicts who follow that leader. There is little or no trust in the almighty God. Faith in self and the ability to keep things under control replaces a true trust that God is control. Persecutors are very controlling people, and their conspirators are just as controlling. In the entire system people fight for control while attributing complete control to the leader.(p. 245)

... With a rule that the leader must be in control of all things at all times, the persecutor tries to change everything and control everything. The bigger the ego, the bigger the belief in the ability to change everything. Until the leader relinquishes control, the ministry continues to teach through example the philosophy, "I must take things into my own hands." That is exactly what religiously addicted followers do.

08-09-2008, 09:49 AM	#9
Nell Admin/Moderator Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Texas Posts: 2,105	Toxic Rule #1 Conrol CONTROL TOXIC RULE #1: The leader must be in control at all times. When a person becomes addicted to something, he or she is completely controlled by it. Deluded by the addiction, the addict is unaware of this loss of control and believes that he or she is in control. Control is a primary issue for people who suffer from an addiction. Toxic faith or religious addiction is no exception. When the toxic faith leader struggles with control on a personal (p. 244) level, he or she attempts to be in the center of control within the system in an effort to affect all the outcomes. The leader desires to have the family say in every decision, whether minimal or monumental. When a religious addict is a parent, the children grow up with little ability to think independently because adherence to the system is so strong. Anyone not adhering to the leader's tough standards is immediately dismissed so that total control, or at least the illusion of total control, can be maintained by the leader who is addicted to the organization and the control it provides. Control is really an illusion. No parent has complete control in any family. No leader can predict all the circumstances and stress that the ministry will confront. The more the person seeks to control the details, the less likely that person will be able to maintain a clear vision of the larger issues of balance and focus in the ministry or family. The more control is sought, the less there is to be had in any circumstance.... If faith is toxic, it exists outside God. It creates a god much different from God the Creator. The control rule exemplifies how God has been re-created in the minds of the toxic faith leader and the religious addicts who follow that leader. There is little or no trust in the almighty God. Faith in self and the ability to keep things under control replaces a true trust that God is control. Persecutors are very controlling people, and their conspirators are just as controlling. In the entire system people fight for control while attributing complete control to the leader.(p. 245) ... With a rule that the leader must be in control of all things at all times, the persecutor tries to change everything and control everything. The bigger the ego, the bigger the belief in the ability to change everything. Until the leader relinquishes control, the ministry continues to teach through example the philosophy, "I must take things into my own hands." That is exactly what religiously addicted followers do.