Quote:
Originally Posted by ThankfulForever777
While it may not directly align with the concept of "learned helplessness," I've observed a trend among many young and middle-aged men within the Lord's Recovery. Many struggle to maintain steady employment or adequately provide for their families. It's disheartening to see a pattern of passivity, where instead of actively pursuing solutions, they resort to complaining about adverse circumstances such as a tough economy or unfair employers. Rather than taking responsibility, they wait passively for someone else to intervene. They won't even adequately pray, fast or have faith in God's promises in his Holy Scriptures.
Interestingly, this contrasts starkly with individuals in another (non-recovery) church where I currently attend where such situations seem nonexistent.
It's clear to me that these men in the Lord's recovery got damaged by confusing teachings and philosophy of Lord's Recovery.
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Something I recently learned through getting Christian counseling in my life:
There is a such thing in the religious groups (like LR), and others, which is basically called Self-Inflicted Martyrdom Complex.
The definition of it is very simple: A person who through his/her actions, creating an environment where they affect people around themselves in a very negative way. That’s done through religious beliefs, teachings, rituals and such. When the people around them finally reach the point of not being able to handle their environment and eventually snapped, the person with SIMC feels as if they are being persecuted or reaching some new spiritual maturity that requires absolute suffering, even to the point of martyrdom. The idea also has roots in principle on self centered sacrifices to receive public or private attention and privileges. It has very destructive effects on people, and even the persons themselves who is doing it. Most of the time those people are very miserable on the inside, have mental problems, although on the outside they will not let anyone know about this.
Upon learning of this, I just realized my days in LC and all of the people that are doing this every day.
How many of us heard things such as:
- [ ] I want to be a martyr!
- [ ] My marriage is a furnace for the Lord!
- [ ] My wife or husband is my cross!
- [ ] My children are my cross and are there to break me!
I heard a lot of this, and it was awful environment to be in. No one should be subjected to this type of behavior as a Christian, including husbands, wives and especially children. People who are practicing this think they are suffering for God, but in essence it’s nothing but self inflicted consequences of own actions that causes them to suffer.
There is a secular definition that doesn’t involve religion, you can read it here.
https://www.verywellmind.com/martyr-...ome-it-7553595
However when religious beliefs are combined with these traits, it’s a truly unbearable situation. Here is a simple quote from the website above:
…a martyr may “feel that they don’t trust anyone else to complete tasks and they need to do it themselves. In exchange, this person often expects recognition of their sacrifice, expansive praise, and gratitude from others and is disappointed and resentful when they don't receive it." This reminds me of a lot of my days around the people in LC, which is extremely unfortunate and painful. There are a lot of people there that just don’t know what’s going on.