[Trapped]

Welcome to the forum, bettercountry!

Thanks for sharing your testimony - what a journey!

Can I ask a question (of you or anyone) that has bugged me for a while? Hope this doesn't hit anyone wrong; I'm just trying to understand.

I'm a church kid and my personal view is that the local church has been damaging for the entire time I was in it. However, I hear many people waxing nostalgic over their time in the local church in the 1970s, about how free and flowing and wonderful a time it was.

What I don't understand is I have come across people who were in OTHER groups around that time who also say the same thing. Is it appropriate at all to chalk some of this atmosphere up to the charismatic movement and the Jesus movement of the 1960s and 1970s, as opposed to some particular specialness of the local church that some seem to still be waiting on to relive again?

I'm not asking in order to deny anyone's feelings. I'm just asking because I'm trying to square away if the local church was rotten from the start or not. It doesn't line up with what I have read in the ministry or of what I have heard of Witness Lee's character and destruction prior to coming to the U.S. that the local church would ever have been considered a pure or good group to join, even if it might have felt good at the time. I just wonder if the euphoric happiness people report having back then was just unawareness of what was really going on, etc... It's striking to me that many people still seem to be wishing for what they had 50 years ago, and I'm just trying to understand if the standard they are wishing for is the standard the Bible sets forth.

I mean, I can think of numerous enjoyable times I had with the young people and trips we went on and lots of time in various saints homes, etc.....but it's like it all became fake and deceptive as I saw the truth about what was really going on. The constant "open homes" for example, actually has some destructive elements because it meant that family boundaries were not respected by saints. Open homes are wonderful for students and floating saints, but very difficult for the couples who have the open home that is invaded and who basically have a stream of people using them day after day. So, as much as I liked it sometimes, I wouldn't pine for that kind of open home situation again because I now know that it was an unhealthy set up in the local church, etc.

Although, as I say all that, I am reminded that numerous times when I interact with people at the church I now attend, at the end of the conversation I am always waiting internally to get that "lunch invite" that happened so often in the LC.....and it usually never comes anymore. The LC had more of a "doing life together" vibe, which was really nice, but again, too often it meant that spouses and kids were being neglected as a consequence. And I'm not sure how much of it is just the love bombing to keep you trapped in with the social connections so you can't leave, or how much of it is real. However real it is, though, is entirely predicated on your acceptance of Witness Lee and his doctrines, so....love based on the acceptance of lies isn't real love.

I can't sort it all out.

Anyway, thanks for any insight.

Trapped